Monthly Archives: December 2011

So what did I get for Christmas?

I got lucky, that’s what   See? It says so here –>

The card is from the rather lovely Vintage Erotica Tarot, just one of my many Christmas presents and the source of many of the previously mentioned giggles In case you can’t see it properly, the card is The Wheel and is subtitled “You Are Lucky”, which pretty much sums up how I feel about life at the moment.

This deck is a collection of, as you might reasonably expect, vintage erotica – lovely original sepia toned pictures of un-airbrushed ladies with naturally shaped bodies and plush, luxuriant lady beards (no Brazilians here, or if there are, it’s due to nationality rather than nether region hairstyling).

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Was this how your Christmas went? Or is that just the stuff of soap operas where everyone on the street/square/close has the kind of issues that make your toes curl?

Did your spouse have you fingering the carving knife longingly? Did your children turn you into a shrieking harpy? Was your head in danger of exploding like an overfilled balloon? Did the relatives have you reaching for the gin? Were you desperate for it all to be over for another year?

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I found myself posting on Facebook last night in response to the deluge of arty-farty perfume ads that pervade our TV viewing at this time of year. Look beyond the obvious glamour and artiness and you have to wonder about some of them: “What the hell were they thinking?”

There is one, in particular that has caught my attention, but for all the wrong reasons, I suspect. I’m afraid I can’t say what it was an advert for, not because I don’t want to name the product , but simply because I don’t know. Adverts tend to leave me apathetic* or bemused, in this case, the latter.

So I will just have to describe it. Here’s how it went:

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I am in the Christmas spirit. Appoximately a pint into the Christmas spirit. In my case, an earlier trip to the supermarket to lay in stocks for Christmas included a bottle of Southern Comfort, which I subsequently combined with a bottle of Crabbies, about half and half.

I’m not normally driven to hit the bottle, but it’s Christmas and, at times, Christmas is really quite depressing. Well, no, that’s not strictly true, it’s the build up to Christmas that’s depressing. The relentless “arthouse” adverts for perfume, the unremitting commercialism,  not to mention the certain knowledge that your Christmas grocery shop would feed a small village (and not even a starving African one) for a month and will probably take considerably longer to lose the weight you’ll gain from the over-indulgence.

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It’s turned a bit nippy of late and in addition to big, roaring fires, woolly socks (hand-knitted, naturally) and fleecy jumpers, what a body needs is calories to keep it warm. Forget starting a diet, (that’s a New Year’s resolution for the breaking), what you want is comfort food with lots of carbs. The obvious candidate for the basis of a warming carb-fest is the humble potato, but if your immediate thoughts turn to chips or mash, then think again.

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See that there picture? Do ya? Do ya?   –>

The one that says “Winner” in large letters for the NaNoWriMo challenge ?   –>

Well…er…..that’s not me.

That there Winner’s certificate belongs to none other that my darling daughter, who embraced the challenge and completed just after 9pm last night

Am I proud? You bet! <puffs up like a puffed-up proud thing>

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